Low Libido After Kids: Why Does it Happen & How Can I Fix It?
Struggling with a low libido after having kids? You’re not alone and we’re going to explain why it happens, plus ways you can work on increasing your sex drive! Check it out.
Having a low libido after kids is so common! Breastfeeding, post pregnancy hormones, lack of sleep and a sore body are just some of the common reasons why new Mums have no or little sex drive. I can see you nodding from here new Mums! While this may seem fine for some, for others going from having an active sex life to a non-existent one is a huge freak out. Well, today’s article is written for all the new Mums (and not so new Mums) about why a low libido occurs and ways you can increase it naturally.
What Does Having a Low Libido Have to Do with Becoming a New Mum?
Is having sex after kids an urban myth? Where do these parents find the time, let alone the energy! Well, there’s this nasty little thing called a low libido which pops up for many new Mums in the months and sometimes years after giving birth.
Caused by changes in her hormones due possibly to breastfeeding and pregnancy itself, it makes a new Mum rather sleep than have sex. Understandably, this can be frustrating for her partner. Sure, they can understand why sex is a no go area for the first month. But surely, she’d be fine from then on?
Well, here’s why we’re not okay with it:
- The amount of oestrogen our bodies make when breastfeeding reduces sex drive
- A dry vagina occurs due to the low oestrogen
- Recovery needs to occur both mentally and physically after giving birth
- We don’t feel sexy as out bodies have changed
- We’re ridiculously tired and would rather sleep
- We have super sonic hearing and the tiniest sound from the baby is enough to stop any intimacy from happening
The question then becomes, how do we fix it?
Easy Ways to Increase your Low Libido After Kids (h2)
While time is the best healer, literally, there are other natural ways you can work towards increasing your low libido after having kids. They include:
- Focus on intimacy outside of the bedroom – hand holding, taking a bath together and cuddling on the couch are great non-sexual and non-threatening activities.
- Identify something which will help you feel beautiful – it may be a manicure, a haircut, or even putting on lippy.
- Spend time not being a Mum – take the time to do an activity you did prior to becoming a Mum. Even a cup of coffee at the café is a great start.
- Get active – exercise raises our endorphins, which make us feel better. A walk around the block or weeding the garden are good ideas.
- Encourage Dad to come into the world of parenting – let him take some of the work off your shoulders, be it nappy changing, cooking tea, doing the washing – it all helps!
One final reason you may have a low sex drive is post-natal depression. This can strike any time after the birth and the fastest way to feel better is to seek professional help! Chat with your Plunket nurse or GP about how you are feeling, and they’ll work with you on a map to recovery.
Being a Mum is a 24/7 job. It never gets easier, but it does change overtime. Trust us when we say that sex won’t be off your list forever – we promise!
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